Critical Writers

Octavia Butler’s “Bloodchild” has truly opened my eyes to the similarities between the risks and rewards of the imaginary planet she writes about, and the risks and rewards I will be encountering as I enter this course. While the concept of her novel was quite obscure, I found myself comparing my coursework to Gan’s journey throughout his life and how he manages the risks and rewards that come with the decisions he has to make. After reading the syllabus, I have many risks and rewards I have to think about too in this upcoming semester. 

The main risk and reward debated in the novel is by the main character, Gan. While Gan has been chosen as the human of his family to lay the eggs of Tlic T’Gatoi, he soon realizes that carrying the eggs might not be as happy and exciting as he had originally assumed. He had originally looked at this opportunity as a privilege, until he witnessed the emergency labor of another male Tlic. In the birth, Gan witnesses the host being eaten by the larvae he had just hatched. Gan ends up killing an animal with an illegal rifle and letting the larvae prey on the deceased carcass rather than Bram Lomas, who was the Tlic who had just hatched the eggs. This scarred Gan, who then proceeded to balance the risks and rewards of being a host, and even was considering suicide if he decided if the risks outweighed the rewards.

Gan’s balancing of his risk and rewards about being a carrier of eggs is similar to my future coursework in this class and how I also have to consider the risks and rewards. One thing I noticed on the syllabus was the huge part I play in grading my own work. The self assessment portion of this course truly opened my eyes to the risks and rewards that come with it. One reward I see with so much self reliance is being able to evaluate my work and determine if I truly feel like I am improving or not. Sometimes I think it can be difficult for onlookers to see extreme differences between two works written by the same person, and the individual themself in my opinion is best at gaging whether they are improving or not. Because of this, the concept of self assessment will really reward me in that I believe I will be fair in assessing my improvement throughout the course. One risk in self assessment that I am worried about however is whether I have the ability to truly judge my work how it is. I am usually much harder on myself than others are, and I might get too antactical when grading myself and assessing my improvement. I must learn to be practical with myself, and hopefully this risk will become more minimized. On the contrary, this self assessment technique truly allows me to be free to make my own choices about my work, which is something I look forward to in this course. While this may normally seem like utter freedom, after rereading the syllabus I realize that the course will still keep me in check and limit me. such as having people such as my classmates give me feedback and help me assess myself. Along with this, the rubrics limit my overthinking when it comes to the self assessment aspect. 

Knowing the risks and rewards of this coursework truly helped me set goals regarding the future of my work in this class. As I stated earlier, Gan balanced the risk and rewards of being a host for T’Gatoi’s larvae, and eventually decided to continue being a host and not commit suicide. This was because he had one goal in mind, which was to keep his family safe. One major reward of continuing to be a host was just that, as if he continued he was told he could keep the illegal gun to keep them safe. This goal ended up helping fuel Gan’s decision, and therefore helped him balance the risks and rewards efficiently. 

Knowing the risks and rewards of this coursework truly helped me set goals regarding the future of my work in this class, just like Gan. I know that going forward, my goal throughout this class is to improve my writing skills. Looking at the risks and rewards of the self-assessment portion of this class, I know I need to be careful when self assessing to achieve my goal. I will be sure to carefully revise my work, and look for minor differences between paper to paper to see if I can see improvements in any aspect. Along with this, another goal I hope to accomplish throughout this course is to improve my intellectual thinking skills. One way I plan on assessing my improvement is by comparing this very paper, to how I would approach it months from now when I finish this course. Hopefully I will have new critical thinking skills and the ability to look at this very paper with an open mind on how I improved. 

Setting goals has always been an extremely important part of my life, just like Gan whos goal fueled him to keep carrying the larvae. In my opinion, my goals will be sure to keep me in check as I balance the risks and rewards of self assessment as I enter this class. With my end goal of improving many writing aspects as well as my critical thinking skills I will be sure to take those goals into account when I am not only writing and expressing my ideas, but also as I assess myself to see how far I have come since the beginning. Gan talks about T’Gatoi and says how “the Preserve was hers by the time she came back… [as a] reward for her hard work.” I know that with my goals in mind, the rewards will outweigh the risks just like they did for T’Gatoi.

Over the semester and throughout the class my writing has changed and developed. At the beginning of the semester, my writing felt like I was still in high school and I felt that my improvement was stagnant and that I could rarely improve. However, through the course of this class, I was able to find my voice as a writer and as an academic writer. Through both the Bloodchild and the Heating Plant essay I was able to learn how to not only improve my writing but also change how I view my writing,

The biggest thing that helped me improve not only my writing but also my thought process I started to think about things like our discussions in class and to our small group discussions, in those small groups, I was able to hear my peers thoughts more clearly as well as learn to express my thoughts, when we were brought back to our large group discussions I felt that the things that people discussed were more developed and were very well thought out from the small groups that we had.

One thing that stuck with me was our discussion with robbie routenberg. Even though we were pushed to being online and were not able to talk in person, the discussions that we had were very impactful for me. I never really understood what happens when there is a racial incident on campus because I am fortunate enough for it to not directly impact me but, hearing the process that happens and that many people are willing to learn from their ignorance was very impactful because the view that I had was that most people make these comments out of hate and less of them saying them out of ignorance and the fact that people are still willing to learn and grow stuck with me that. It showed me that I had the willingness to grow and that I should try to learn how to give people second chances.

One thing that is crucial for me to improve as a writer is to be able to keep trying and to keep persisting. One thing that I learned from my time in INTD 105 is that the first draft isn’t going to be the same as the final product. I used to believe that if my first draft and my final product were so different then they wouldn’t be good. Throughout this class, I have learned that my first draft changing isn’t a bad thing but a good thing. I may have gained new developments since starting my draft and, the more that I learn the more my draft is going to shift to fit what I have learned. I think that my initial fear of my work not being good enough on the first round stopped me from improving my writing skills throughout my adolescence. This class has pushed me to challenge those fears and that has made me a better writer overall.

In Octavia Butler’s short story, “bloodchild” she explores the ideas of risks and rewards and how they relate to each other. By creating a sci-fi world in her short but impressionable story, she creates complicated internal conflicts within the characters that relate to these risks and rewards. Is risking something eventually worth the reward you get from doing it? That is the question the main character, Gan, tries to answer when it comes to his debacle on whether or not he should be implanted by an egg of an alien species. 

The struggle within Gan shows that choosing the right answer to something that could affect you for the rest of your life is not an easy decision. One must think about the pros and cons before making a life-changing decision. There were many factors that went into Gan’s thought process. He had been aware most of his life that T’Gatoi was basically grooming him to carry her egg. Gan had seen this as something that was meant to happen, and in the beginning of the story, there wasn’t anything in the way that was going to change his mind. But, it only took one experience to change his mind. One of Gan’s kind was suffering from flesh-eating worms inside his body- which the reader would later figure out was how the Terran birthed the children of the Tlic of which they had inserted inside of them. The only way to save him was for T’Gatoi to open him up and move the worms into another warm body. She had Gan go out and kill a large mammal so that once she removed the worms, they could be placed inside there. That was the first thing that upset Gan a little bit, having to kill an achti. Secondly, just watching this gruesome process made him quite uneasy. Some of the things that T’Gatoi did, such as “lick away [the] blood” of the other man (18) really made Gan not feel special. He thought that she was enjoying this and that she didn’t care about who she did it to. Gan, feeling like just another Terrnan, traded the feeling like he mattered to T’Gatoi for ambiguity. He felt like another pawn in the game of chess that the Tlic loved to play.

After T’Gatoi healed the man, Gan was talking to his older brother, Qui. Qui had also seen something similar happen to a man, except it had a very different outcome. In that instance, the Tlic didn’t have anything to transport the young into. The Terran ended up being in so much pain that he asked the Tlic to just kill him because it was so bad. After the Terran’s throat was slit, the young began to eat him from the inside out. This had traumatized Qui and after that experience he hadn’t wanted anything to do with the Tlic, including T’Gatoi even though she was a very close family friend. He knew that it was a possibility that this could happen to him, and he didn’t want to risk it so he disassociated himself from her kind. In doing this, he ultimately put the responsibility onto Gan, since Tlic usually implanted their eggs in males rather than females. After this whole situation, Gan made T’Gatoi aware that he no longer wanted to go through with it, to which she was disappointed but didn’t give up hope in implanting her eggs into a Terran. The next person she would go to would be Gan’s sister, who was more than willing to do it. But, Gan had a very quick change of heart once he thought about the consequences to this action. He valued his sister’s life over his own. Doing something like this would be very high risk and if she didn’t survive somehow, Gan would go on to blame himself for her death. This shows that he has very strong bonds with his family, and sacrificing himself to ensure everyone else lives was what he was willing to do. Of course, he could survive this, and nothing too bad could happen, but if something did, it would be to him. So, eventually T’Gatoi implanted the egg in Gan (32). 

The ending made the reader feel comforted with Gan’s future, for T’Gatoi said that she would always be there to take care of him. And since she has been there his whole life, why would anything change now? Taking the risk of having the egg implanted in him, Gan knew what he was signing up for. The reward of this action was that his sister didn’t have to be the one at risk of dying with the children inside of her. He sacrificed his own life for her, even though it’s not a guarantee that he will die, but there is always a chance. A chance he is willing to take to save his sister.

Thinking of this course as a “preserve” as what was mentioned in the story, they are both similar. According to the reading of the foundational course documents, the way in which the course is formatted gives some freedom and flexibility to anyone taking it. Living in the preserve, Gan and his family have freedom in that they may spend their lives with whoever they chose, as Gan’s parents did. But their freedom is limited because the Tlic really do control the preserve. But, the Terran have a certain power of Tlic in that they are the best creatures to hold their children. The way that one student interprets something can be totally different than another student’s. Everything in this course is about the goals you set for yourself and self-reflection and improvement. As a writer, I tend to focus on the tiny details of a story rather than the big picture which could really help in the long run with conceptual ideas. Finding out the main idea or a theme could help with becoming a better reader and even writer because you are able to zoom out and take it all in.

Octavia Butler conveys the risks and rewards of decisions made on a preserve in her short story Bloodchild. Bloodchild is narrated by a young human named Gan. Gan is ‘Terran’ (human living on an alien planet), dominated by the Tlic, insect-like species. The Tlic can not reproduce of their own, so the Terran are carriers for the alien species eggs, and in return, the Tlic protects them. Gan does not question his role as a carrier first; being a carrier has its risks and rewards. Students have risks and rewards in school. In Professor McCoy’s course “WritSem: RisksRewardsAcdPart” exhibits this.

Students can assess their work. Self-assessing your work is “a process that depends on trust, transparency, accountability, care, and acknowledging the possibility of harm.” (McCoy) This is a massive reward for students because students focus less on the end-producing grade and more on their thinkING and self-growth (Professor McCoys biggest takeaway from this class). As a student, I stress my grades, so this class will help me grow as a student and person. I can focus more on my thinkING and applying it to my work than my actual grade. With rewards come risks. A risk you can encounter in this course is not taking given feedback and using it to your following assignments. Professor McCoy and peers provide feedback on assignments in good- faith practice. So If a student does not apply the feedback, they will have a difficult time growing in this class.

A considerable part of self-growth in this course is self-assessed assignments. Self-assessed assignments are “graded” using “care for course accountability, care for growth, and care for peers growth,” as shown in the syllabus. Making sure you hold yourself accountable to your work comes with responsibility “process that depends on trust, transparency, accountability, care, and acknowledging the possibility of harm.” Sometimes you are your harshest critic. You probably are tougher on yourself than others, making it difficult to see others’ work and not compare your work. With the responsibility of self-assessment comes with a lot of risk and reward. Just like how students self-grow in this course, Gan in Bloodchild also self-grows. At the beginning of the story, Gan does not understand the real sacrifice he has bearing T’Gatoi offspring. After witnessing the birth of Bram Lomas, he is filled with horror and dread, but he considers his feelings with everyone around him and can face his fear and bear his weight responsibility. He upholds his duty making him come of age and leave his childhood behind.

The most crucial reward of self-grading is not having to stress about making sure everything is “correct” to get a good grade but instead putting your focus on making sure your work is personable, and you are thinkING. While performing self-grading, you learn your strengths and weaknesses, which will help you define your own goals/steps to improve yourself while meeting your expected level of educational achievements. 

A self-assessment risk is accurately grading yourself (are you giving yourself enough credit or giving yourself too much credit). As scary as risks can be, they can also be a good thing. You can take Professor McCoy’s and peers’ positive feedback into consideration. However, not taking feedback and applying it to your other assignments can make it challenging to grow your mindset.

Along with self-growth making sure you set goals for yourself is also vital. My goal for this semester and course is to speak up more, especially in group discussions. I struggle a lot with a class discussion. I feel like other people’s opinions matter more than mine. Sometimes I think that my perspective on the material is not very valuable, so there is no sharing point. My feeling for this stems from my social anxiety. I have to face my fear and participate in class discussions so I can self grow. This relates to Gan’s situation in Bloodchild. Gan is put into a position that he is not used to, but he faces his fear and self-growth.

ThinkING and learning are two concepts that I believe are the key too being successful in whatever you do in life, but especially in college. This course really focuses on thinkING and learning, and I feel that in this course I will learn both the risks and rewards of these concepts. Thinking is the action of using one’s mind to produce thoughts (Merriam-Webster Dictionary). In this course I can tell that I have already become a more in-depth thinker. For example, when I was doing the second to the forum assignment on good faith, I had to dig deep and think of how I try to use good faith. Also making connections requires much thinking. Learning is described as knowledge or skill acquired by instruction or study (Merriam-Webster Dictionary). Having the ability to self-assess myself will really show me whether or not I reached my full potential. As always, I set goals high for myself and try my best to achieve those goals, and with this course I have the opportunity to set my own goals throughout the semester. Although I many not always achieve the goals I set that is a part of the “risks” much of what this course focuses on.

There are many risks and rewards that this class offers. One reward that I already took out of this course so far is having the ability to change my “growth mindset” for the better. In the syllabus it states, “These questionnaires emphasize growth mindset” (Professor McCoy). Having the chance to think critically and analyze many different texts is something that this course offers. In this class receiving feedback from my peers will help me to grow as a writer and person. Sometimes the feedback given by a peer might not be something you want to hear, or it may not be constructive but that is all part of the “risks” in this class. In this course the risks will help develop more opportunities for thinking and learning. I have always considered myself to have a growth mindset, where you can learn new things. For me in this course I am going to be learning many new things. Since this is a self-assessed class, I have to trust myself to stay on top of the work in order to succeed. I also have to look at my work from a different point of view, I can’t be too harsh on myself or grade too easy. In this class I am looking forward to learning how to grade myself, I have never been given this opportunity before. This course sets limits and rewards on self-assessing. As professor McCoy states “This process entails substantial risk on my part. I believe the possibilities for thinkING and learning are worth the risk.” (McCoy)

This course offers many risks and rewards and it is up too you whether or not you make the most out of it. For me, the process of self-growth as a writer is what I hope to focus on. By the end of the semester I hope to notice a difference in my ability to write, analyze, learn, think, and self-assess. There are limits on all of goals and choices that I have in this course, but in life there are always limits on what you can and cannot do. This course is about responsibility and accountability. I believe that taking risks are well worth it especially if in the end a reward comes out of the “risk”. The overall goal for me in INTD 105 is to further my “growth mindset”, be honest with myself, continue learning, and thinkING to become a successful writer throughout college and beyond.

If this course, INTD 105-04, is comparable to that of the Preserve in Octavia Butler’s “Bloodchild”, then parallels may also be drawn from the partnerships formed within these two institutions or refuge. The common ground of the partnership between Gan and T’Gatoi, the partnership between the students of INTD 105-04 and Professor Beth McCoy, and any partnership in general, is built on a foundation of trust. Alongside trust are its risks and rewards, and its responsibilities.

The conditional trust between Gan and T’Gatoi is one that is born through force of circumstance. Both characters are a part of a system that rewards the partnership of a Tlic and Terran: within the Preserve established by T’Gatoi and her political faction, the Terrans are protected from the hordes of Tlics that did not understand, or in their desperation, saw and would have treated Terrans as nothing more than ideal host animals for their young. (Butler, 5) In return, Terrans would willingly carry the fertile eggs of the Tlic ensuring that the Tlic species would not go extinct. Gan had absolutely no qualms about receiving the honor of becoming an N’Tlic, the host of T’Gatoi’s eggs, until he witnessed childbirth for the first time. Lomas, an N’Tlic, who had (unknowingly) accepted the risk in becoming an N’Tlic – for no Terran, according to T’Gatoi’s experience and knowledge, had seen a birth and take it well, and thus they should be protected from seeing (Butler, 28) – had suffered the horrifying consequences of being left alone by his Tlic partner during childbirth. The possibility of sharing the same fate as Lomas hadn’t been a risk that Gan was willing to take, which left both him and T’Gatoi at a stalemate. Their responsibilities – T’Gatoi to her people, and Gan to his family – were what established their fragile partnership in the end. Both of them have the means to hurt one another to the point beyond forgiveness: in allowing Gan to keep the rifle, T’Gatoi risks putting herself and her children in danger; and there is no telling of the possibility of T’Gatoi being absent when Gan gives birth to her children. It is Gan who has said it best: “There is risk, Gatoi, in dealing with a partner.” (Butler, 26)

Any partnership involves risk and responsibility. To love someone is also to risk heartbreak. To promise or to be promised something is also to risk a promise broken. For Professor McCoy to extend her trust to the students INTD 105-04, so that they can “meaningfully, thoughtfully, and honestly assess their own coursework based on feedback they receive from instructor and peers” (McCoy), would require good faith on her part, and course accountability of the students.

There are many rewards, two in particular, that I intend to take away from this course. The first is to become accustomed to the sense of independence in writing through self-assessment in order to become a dependable judge of character of myself and others. To accomplish this would require that I would be honest to myself about my own work, for it is in my hands now to recognize any error or (harmful) carelessness in my writing. However, self-criticism cannot be taken too far lest it becomes something that would be detrimental to personal growth. To be overly critical or overly lenient would lead to an inaccurate evaluation of character; unnecessary steps may be taken to fix what isn’t broken, and the real problems may be ignored. The second is to use this opportunity to help myself in transitioning from having a fixed mindset to a growth mindset. Because this course removes the “stress-producing grades that end up inevitably becoming the focus instead of the learning” (McCoy), students will be able to dedicate their full attention to their writing and thinkING process, personal growth, and looking out for their peers. I do not doubt that INTD 105-04 is a space that would allow the growth mindset to thrive. Rather than anxiously waiting to be graded on the final product of my paper, I could appreciate the journey taken to arrive at my paper’s destination. I would be given more room to ask myself how could I have done better, what I can improve on, what can I do differently next time, rather than agonizing over the shallow question of “did I do good?” 

However, the benefits and purpose of self-grading policy would be rendered useless if I, or any student in general, did not care for the responsibilities that come with it. At any point in time, should Gan ever decided to shirk his responsibility of keeping his family safe as his eldest brother Qui had, then he has his sister and T’Gatoi’s trust to lose – T’Gatoi, who “stood between [him and his family] and her own people, protecting, interweaving”, who chose to give Gan the benefit of doubt. (Butler 29) It was his responsibility, according to his mother, to take care of T’Gatoi in return. Like Gan who demonstrates accountability in one instance where he felt guilt for inadvertently hurting her, as a student of Professor McCoy, it is my job to hold myself responsible for my actions in this course.

You wouldn’t typically think of taking a class as inherently risky. I think all choices we make, including taking a class, come with inherent risks and rewards. Some of the risks that come to mind when talking about taking a class are embarrassment and failure. Some of the rewards associated with taking a college class are growth and success. Going beyond the choice to take a class, are all the choices that will take place during your time in that class.. Students taking Intd 105 will learn  how to give and take feedback. We will be given the freedom to choose what we write about and be offered the responsibility to self assess  ourselves. Thinking about these choices I will have to make, and the short story Bloodchild by Octavia E. Butler helped me develop my goals for this course. 

In Bloodchild by Octavia E. Butler impossible decisions are made, and risks and rewards are felt out.  Tlics, centipede-like creatures and Terrans, humans, are reliant on each other for survival. Humans live on this alien planet and aliens take care of them, in return humans must choose 1 male to be impregnated with the Tlics eggs.  The decisions, risks and rewards the main character, Gan, faces are very intense. Although it may not seem like he has many choices, at one point Gan gets told “Would you really rather die than bear my young,” by his Tlic that is taking care of him. Choosing between dying and letting your family down or being implanted with alien eggs, to protect them, is a tough one. Although it could be argued there are no real decisions to be made, because the Tlics hold all the power and the Terrans are at whim to whatever the Tlics want. Gan must analyze the choices he has and choose the best one while considering quality of life, and his family. So instead Gan made the decision to agree to being impregnated with alien eggs, even after seeing a traumatizing surgery to remove the centipede offspring before it ate a man inside out. Though Gan doesn’t have much of a choice about if he has the eggs or not, he can choose his attitude towards his situation. Gan chooses to trust in the Tlics unlike his brother who has a bitter attitude towards them. Gan understands that everyone is dependent on each other.  Thinking about Gan and his tough decisions helped me to think about the choices I had to make for this semester. Although none of my choices are anywhere near as severe as Gan’s. 

One risk students will take in  INTD 105 Risk and reward course, is facing fears. While taking this class the syllabus will provide students guidance on the way the class will work throughout the year. In the course syllabus Professor McCoy informs students that we will be sharing our work and providing feedback to each other. I feel like this is a risk for some students, like myself, who don’t feel strong in their writing abilities. Professor McCoy said in the syllabus “Remember that growth will be difficult if not impossible if work is not presented consistently for feedback;” Sharing written assignments with the class, and opening yourself up to feedback definitely can feel like an academic risk. However, without feedback I know I will never improve my writing skills. Feedback is extremely important especially when it comes to honing in on a skill. Sharing our work with each other and giving comments from our peers is a great thing. The more people to share our work with the more beneficial it is to write.  The fear of putting our work out into the world is outweighed, in my opinion, by the great reward of experience and enhancement.  Writing skills are life long, so any chance to improve on them is a success. I’m delighted to share my work and receive feedback from my peers because it will help me grow. My first goal for this course is to overcome any reservations I have about presenting my work with others 

The choice of what we write about is another risk and reward of this class. The writing prompts found in the syllabus leave the choices up to the writer. Professor Mcoy wrote in the syllabus , “You have considerable leeway in interpreting the epigraph and focusing your essay,”  under the prompt for the final reflection essay. Being able to have choice in what you’re writing about as opposed to extremely limiting essay prompts is both a risk and reward choice for students. This requires students to think critically, analyze important texts and be able to form their own arguments and opinions to write about. Developing the skills to navigatie creating and writing arguments with no direction  this is another objective of mine for this course. 

Perhaps the most notable decisions students will make during this course is self assessment. Students will have to honestly judge themselves and their work. I think this is an ability everyone should have and practice. For some, it may feel odd to assess their own growth because they may feel biased, or feel like they are reversed biased and too hard on themselves. It can be very difficult to calibrate when it comes to yourself. But the more accurately you can assess yourself the better for you. That’s why practicing self assessment is another goal of mine this semester.  Reading Bloodchild by Octavia  E. Butler helped me to create several goals for my course this semester. The short story got me thinking about decisions, choices and the risks or rewards that can come with taking any class. My goals are to work on developing strong writing skills that will help me long after this course. I would like to be able to confront situations where I have to use my annalysiszing text skills, applying feedback skills to my work,  and being able to confidently share work  with peers. I know I will grow and hope I will meet my goals.

Throughout high school, English was nothing but a grade to me. I believed that it was just another course I had to take in order to graduate, with no intention of pursuing it in the future. This mindset continued into college, as in my head, this writing seminar class was just a mandatory course for my biology degree. However, when I arrived at Geneseo, I quickly realized this would not be the case. In actuality, this class is giving me the opportunity to set limits and work freely to improve my writing capabilities, as well as expand on my everyday thinking. It is allowing me to make my own choices and teaching me how to fully articulate them to an audience. Within my first class of Risks and Rewards of Academic Partnership, I understood the true purpose of the class. Professor McCoy quickly showed me that the true intent of the class was all about self reflection, where I was going to work to not only better myself as a writer, but as an individual. Professor McCoy immediately showed her attention and appreciation to all of the minor details within writing, all of the things that students may completely overlook. 

Through the course, she is trying to teach the importance of thinking and revising, showing students the significance of taking their time and truly thinking about the impact that each word has on the overall final piece. However, there are some topics that can not be taught, such as accountability and care, which are the key ideas discussed throughout the course. The immense amount of responsibility within this course poses as both a positive and negative factor, as each student holds the ability to decide their own fate in the class. This is also where the objective of risks and rewards take place.

I think that the most unique part of this class is the immense amount of self evaluation. Through the process of grading yourself, it is easy just to give yourself a quick 100 and move on with your day. However, this is not the point of the class. By grading yourself, you have to detach yourself and read from an outside perspective. In addition, every individual has an idea of their own capabilities, so you can be your best judge, as you know exactly what you excel at and what you can improve on. Personally, I would like to work on being less critical of my own work. I fully understand I am nowhere near a perfect writer, so as I work to critique my writing, I would like to also learn to compliment my own work. I believe by doing this, it will guide me to become a better writer and a better version of myself. Overall, I think this is a very efficient process of improvement because it allows you to focus on yourself and truly think about new ways to perfect your own writing. During my time in this class, I would like to build confidence in my writing and learn new techniques to go about communicating my ideas. 

I think that a tremendous portion of the class is about taking responsibility. This sounds like a very simple idea, but in reality, they are so many layers to it. Having so much responsibility in a class has its risks and rewards, which is what the class primarily focuses on. While we continue through the semester reading about other people’s risks and rewards in writing, we are going through it ourselves without even realizing it. However, this topic reaches far beyond a writing seminar class.

 Every day, we must make decisions, it’s just how life works. Whether these challenges are about what to eat for breakfast, or what to wear one day, they can hold their own risks and rewards, no matter how big or small they may appear. Yet, with every confrontation you are faced with, it’s key to take responsibility for every decision you have to make. Especially today in college, students are faced with many new challenges and they have to make difficult decisions. With the majority of students’ schedules filled with online classes, it poses a difficulty to focus and excel with their time management. Mainly with factors such as online tests, students may have the temptation to search for an answer or ask a friend for help. Nonetheless, this is where responsibility takes on an essential role, as they must make a choice. If one decides to cheat or ignore an online lecture, how will the professor know? This may seem like a reward, yet in the long run, it will most definitely pose a risk, as the student will not know the material for future class discussions and exams. When making these decisions it is incredibly critical to understand the risks and rewards of every scenario, as one short lived award may easily turn into a dangerous risk.

Because of this, the ideas of accountability and care for yourself, as well as others, becomes crucial. According to the syllabus, the three main key concepts to follow are “Care for My Course Accountability”, “Care for My Growth”, and “Care for Peers’ Growth”. By following these guidelines, one can greatly accentuate their growth mindset, aiding them to enhance their writing skills, while also having the ability to grow as an individual. Through making these daily decisions and taking on any risks in hopes of a final reward, care plays a significant role. Caring for yourself as well as your peers can greatly help one succeed as a writer and overall character. Through caring for your peers, you can expand your ideas and get inspired from other people’s feedback. I believe that by following all of these set principles, the opportunities for growth are limitless.

The United States today is dealing with debatably the worst ongoing health crisis it has ever faced. As a student, my summer “vacation” consisted of sitting at home refreshing my school email every few hours waiting for updates. Will they be using my old dorm room to house positive cases? Will I be going back in the fall? Even if we can go back, should I return to campus or stay home and work? Will I be able to afford college this year? These were only some of the thoughts running through my mind regarding going virtual this year. As I write this, the future is still uncertain, and some of these questions remain. Determining my plans this academic year was based on weighing the pros and cons of my options. One course, in particular, a writing seminar of risks and rewards with Dr. Beth McCoy highlights the risks and rewards to her college course. Just as in Octavia Butler’s short story “Bloodchild”, there is risk and reward to living on the preserve.

In a course designed around risk and reward, opportunities and restrictions are prevalent amongst the expectations for this course. Dr. McCoy’s writing seminar provides students with trust and an opportunity to be mindful of the growth of not only themselves but their peers. This is to center the focus of this class to be based more on learning than trying to get by with a sufficient grade. Dr. McCoy also incorporated a Care policy. This involves care for accountability, your own growth, and your peers’ growth. For example, the Tlics and Terrans in “Bloodchild”. They live amongst each other with rules set in place allowing them to live in peace. Tlics must protect Terrans, and in return, Terrans provide Tlics with one male from each family to host Tlic eggs. Tlics and Terrans have their own version of Dr. McCoy’s Care policy. They must rely on each other for survival. By providing students the opportunity to focus on the quality of their work over a number in the grade book provides a safe space to share their writing and knowledge to peers without fear of judgment. Being able to share your ideas freely is extremely rewarding. To allow students the opportunity to focus on their growth over grade will also show success and be rewarding to all students that take this course.

From the syllabus, the main learning outcomes from the writing seminar are as follows. “The ability to read significant texts carefully and critically, recognizing and responding to argumentative positions. The ability to write and revise sustained, coherent and persuasive arguments on significant issues that arise from the content at hand. The ability to write clearly, following the conventions of Standard English. The ability to incorporate information gleaned through library research into written arguments.” The class is meant to provide basic reading and writing proficiency for higher-level college courses. In order to find success in this course, we must slow down and take the time to read, understand, and respond to readings with a persuasive argument. At the beginning of June, I was given a choice. To return to campus, or stay at home and continue doing online classes as I did for the majority of the spring semester and the summer term. I chose to return to campus, as I was diagnosed with asthma, and my parents were worried about my safety. Geneseo is a much smaller town than where I am from and would provide me the isolation and quarantine duration I would need if deemed necessary. 

At the same time, academic dishonesty is a serious issue SUNY Geneseo takes very seriously. Students in all classes run the risk of being academically dishonest. Especially while the majority of classes are being held virtually and online. In spite of the current situation our country is facing, we as students are in turn responsible to maintain time management, and a consistent work ethic. As a current sophomore, last year was very stressful managing time with friends, classes, and workload. Now with the global pandemic, we face an extra challenge of health safety. The uncertainty can have lasting mental health effects on all of us, especially as students. When faced with stress and a lack scheduling, it is easy for students to search for a shortcut in any way they can. Luckily, maintaining my coursework for several classes thus far, even under the pressures of health safety in the Geneseo community has been manageable. 

According to the fight or flight theory, when faced with a stressful situation, you have two options. Some may try to flee or avoid the scene at all costs, but it is those who push through headfirst that will find success first. I am very lucky to have supportive friends and family that want to see me grow as a student. They have helped me to see the bigger picture when I am distracted by what the future holds and how it will affect me. Although the next few years are uncertain as to what the pandemic has in store for our country, we have to focus on the rewards and push through the risks.

Octavia Butler’s “Bloodchild” is a story about the risks and rewards of decisions made within a “Preserve,” a space wherein power both makes choices possible and sets limits on them. A college course may be understood as one such “preserve,” and this course on the risks and rewards of academic partnership reads as no exception. In the courses foundational documents it states that students are graded by themselves. Students grade themselves based on their personal care for their course accountability, their growth, and their peer’s growth. This is how the course gives its students the power to make decisions but also set limits on them. The course creates a situation where students are given the opportunity to make choices that will affect their grade but also set a limit on them through accountability, honesty, and obviously the guidance of the course’s professor. This is where a connection to Octavia Butler’s “Bloodchild” can be formed. In the story humans live on a planet in a protected community previously mentioned as a “Preserve”. In the preserve the humans are protected by an alien race called the Tlic. In exchange for protection within the preserve humans have the eggs of the Tlic as they are ideal hosts. The group of humans provide one male of each family to be a host for the Tlic’s eggs. Through this relationship between beings, humans have the ability to make decisions that have risks and rewards but ultimately are limited by the Tlics.

 I like to visualize the humans in “Bloodchild” as the students of INTD 105. We both make decisions that come with risks and rewards. Meanwhile the Tlics represent the limits held on those decisions we make, such as guidelines given within the course like its syllabus and the content given by Professor McCoy. While students are given the freedom to choose how they interpret and respond to content. They are actually steered in a very open direction by the prompts and guidance given by Professor McCoy. This partnership that I share with Professor McCoy, in my opinion, really creates an educational environment that can really have an affect on my growth as a writer. My personal growth is my number one goal not only as a writer, but as a student. The betterment of my thinking of my thinking is why I continued my education. The way I’m able to make a decision on how I would like to view a prompt and then be very slightly guided in a direction to take my thinking really opens my mind to what I’m writing about. The risk is very small as there is not really an incorrect way to take a prompt so there is no wrong answer. However the risk really comes with the understanding of the content. INTD 105 is online so students must teach themselves most of the time apart from Professor McCoy’s guidance. The reward of this course though, comes in Professor McCoy’s feedback and the overall growth in writing skills a student obtains.

While my main goal is relatively simple. I like to surround myself with little goals that will effectively accomplish my main goal. Starting with a small goal can really help accomplishing a larger one. The first one to start with would be to work on writing better and concise central ideas that are relevant to the topic. Understanding a prompt and what it is asking you to do is important and it is what your writing will be about. While INTD 105 allows its students to interpret the prompt freely, it does give a writer somewhat of a path to go down. Being able to understand these prompts and knowing what to write about is definitely the first small goal to go for. Completing this goal comes with more practice, the more content I consume in INTD 105 the more I’ll be able to understand. A second goal I have is to better support  statements I make in my writing. This is a key skill to writing as it helps connect ideas and convey a message that I want to leave to my readers. I feel that I can accomplish this goal by providing more efficient evidence that will fully support my statements in my writing. Using these skills would accomplish one of the Learning Outcomes of INTD 105’s syllabus in section C-3 which is “The ability to write clearly, following the conventions of Standard English”.

INTD 105 is about the risks and rewards of academic partnership. I need to make the decisions that will help me achieve my goals whether there’s a limit or not. The Content that comes with this course is used to make writers better. While online education may limit the amount of learning I can achieve, it is up to me to make the decisions that can maximize my learning, It will allow me to grow as much as I can as a writer.